Thursday, January 29, 2009

Derby the Dalmation


My name is Derby... my Puppa is Mike, and Cilwy is his girlfurwend... but I beg to differ, I think she is MY girlfurwend... I wuv her wewy much.

I met Destiny back in Apwil when my Puppa and her Momma started dating .... just when she got sick. I waz bummed b'cuz I just met her and I liked having a buddy around to do stuff wif. I am gwad she got better and we got to pway this summer.

I didnt always understand why she couldnt pway or keep up with me, but I wuv'd her just the same. She was very purty... and I wuv'd being her furwend..

Sometimes we would just hang out together

I liked to kiss her

No matter where we went we always had fun!

We went swimming too!

Sometimes we just liked to chill out.....

Cilwy has been wewy sad since Destiny has been gone. I'm not as sad because I know I will see her again someday... so I try to do things to cheer Cilwy up....

I act wike a cwown....

I sweep in her bed when she is sad....

I give her lots of wet kisses...

or I sweep in Destiny's bed to keep it warm....

Although.. I have to admit.. its not the same when Destiny isnt here....

I did want to thank awl the doggies out there who cheered Cilwy up wif their comments and wuv'ins. I give her kisses, butt wiggles and smiles every day to make sure she stays happy.


Sunday, January 25, 2009

My promise to Destiny

When Destiny fell ill back in April... there were a few long and scary days where I wasn't sure if Destiny would pull through. I was heartbroken because we had just gotten out on our own... it was supposed to be me and her against the world - the Adventures of Cilly and Destiny! I had grand plans of taking her camping, hiking, swimming - all the things we loved to do... and then in a moment, all those plans were put on hold.

As she was healing and on the road to recovery, as I was administering fluids to make her stronger and well, I promised her that this summer - if she pulled through - if she had strength - would be the best summer of our lives.

I promised her long afternoons of lazing in the sun. I promised her napping and flicking butterflies off her ears... I promised her swimming, hiking, and seeing beautiful things. And, to the best of my knowledge - she wanted all those things to come true, because she got strong enough and well enough to experience them all. I lived out my promise to her, and took her to all our favorite places last summer.

One place in particular is a 200' waterfall in the mountains of western Maine. Its a gem of a place, not that many people know of it, and its always been a magical place for me and my girl. I was anxious to take her back there, and I was thrilled to show it to Mike and Derby the Dalmatian for the first time.

Destiny was still shaky from just recovering from her first bout of renal failure. I wasn't sure she would be able to handle such a hike.

But my girl, the Queen of Ten-Ass-City.... took to the trail and hiked gallantly along side Derby.

To get to the waterfall, we have to cross a river 5 times... some areas were easy to cross... others were a little scary. At one point, Destiny's reign over Ten-Ass-City was being challenged, and it didn't look hopeful that she would have the nerve to cross over with the rest of us.

I kept her leash tight so she knew I wouldn't let her be swept down the rapids... and I kept saying "C'mon Des! You can do it! I've got you! C'mon Destiny!"..... Mike and Derby got across, and he joined in the cheering section... "C'mon Des! C'mon Girl! You can do it!"

Since it was a holiday weekend, there were alot of people hiking along with us.... and soon, as people hop-scotched across the rocks and made their way to the other side of the river, and they looked back at the timid white dog.. and something about her made them join in... "C'mon girl! C'mon Destiny!"

Before I knew it, a dozen strangers were cheering on my girl... she looked at all of us with hesitation, then she looked at me with determination.... and she leapt into the water and made her way over to us.... with tears in my eyes, I joined in the applause and cheers that the complete strangers had engaged in.... little did they know the battle my girl had fought to be there that day - little did they know who they were cheering for.... they were cheering for the White Wonder... Destiny - the Queen of Ten-Ass-City. She made it across and was greeted with pats on the head -"Atta girls" and I even saw some people doing high-5's...

That moment will live in my heart forever.

Once we crossed that tenuous part of the river, the rest of the hike was a piece of cake, and we approached a 200 foot waterfall....

We stayed there a few hours... long enough to eat lunch - talk with fellow hikers, and gather strength for the trek back.

Appropriately enough.... this location is named
Angel Falls.

I received Destiny's ashes back on Thursday, along with a Tera-cotta mold of her paw print. I promised Destiny as I sat with her last Friday that I will take her back to Angel Falls, and she will forever be the Queen of Ten-Ass-City.... and that moment that she showed to herself, showed me, and showed all those wonderful strangers what she was made of, will live on forever.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

A sign from Destiny

I posted a link to Destiny's blog on my friends Facebook page.... and it made me enter a "captcha" phrase....

the phrase was

paradise found

On the coast of somewhere beautiful

Knew I could never hold that girl
She was born to see the world
All I got is a picture she mailed me
Barefoot in the snow white sand
A bag of sea shells in her hand
She finally found a paradise it seems

On the coast of somewhere beautiful
Trade winds blowin through her hair
Sunlight dancin on the water
And I wish I was there
Don't know how I'm goin' to find her
All I know so far
She's on the coast of somewhere beautiful
Runnin' with my heart

Sometimes whne the sun goes down
Shadows fall across this littl
e town
And I close my eyes and I drift away
to another place in another time
When the
world was ours and she was mine
I dream of holdin her again someday

On the coast of somewhere beautiful
Trade winds blowin through her hair
Sunlight dancin on the water
And I wish I was there
Dont know how I'm gonna find her
All I know so far

Shes on a coast somewhere beautiful
Runnin with my heart

Dont know how I'm goin to find her
All i know so far
Shes on the coast of somewhere beautiful
Runnin with my heart
Ohh Shes runnin with my heart
On the coast of somewhere beautiful

Monday, January 19, 2009

Life without Destiny....

First off... I want to thank each and every human and doggie for their love, support, and snuggles. Your words and woofs have gotten me through some pretty hard days.

I'm not sure how long I will keep Dessie's blog going, but I feel the need to post a little bit more.

Thank you for the poetry about the Rainbow Bridge. I remember hearing about it once before, but it helped reading it again... and yes, I am convinced that not only did my girl make it safely, but she is there guiding through the trail of life as she always did.

Destiny and I used to do alot of X-country skiing. Ski-jouring if you will. Well, we pretended we were ski jouring anyway...

Destiny took me down amazing trails, and she never waivered or wandered. She kept amazing pace, and we would fly fly fly down winding trails and across fields... Her favorite thing in the world was to get harnessed up and blaze trail. She had determination. All I would have to say is "trail" to keep her on track... click once to right, twice to left... Psssshttt to stop. Most of the time, we trailed in the silence of the snowy woods.... just the sound of my ski's, birds twirping, and snow melting in the lazy sun of winter. It was harmonious.

Well, Sunday we were supposed to get "some" snow. 3-6 inches according to most reports. We ended up getting 18".... a foot and a half of fluffy fun snow. The kind that is perfect for snow angels, perfect for skiing, perfect for playing. Dessie Lu-Lu wants Momma to play. To this day my little girl doesn't understand the concept that Momma's gotta work. lol.

So, as far as searching for signs... I don't really know if 18" of snow is THE sign... but Destiny was my soul mate. And as her soul mate... I just know she is ok... she knows I am going to be ok... We never had to say much to each other... we just knew.

I stayed with my boyfriend all weekend. In fact, Friday night Mike had to work, and I went up to his room and fell asleep early. Mike arrived home from work at about midnight to find me soundly sleeping after having cried myself to sleep.... with a Dalmatian curled right up beside me. Derby had snuck his way into bed with me, and in his own way decided it was his job to comfort me.... he is trully a good step-dog.

Yesterday we came back to my apartment for the first time since.... and it was hard. This was her home. Its so quiet and empty without her here. But, I cherish each memory I have of her here... her toys, her bed, her pictures... I want them all to remain just as they are. Derby can use them when he visits, and someday - when the Universe sends another soul to be rescued and to rescue me... it will be there for that pup too.

Tonight is my first night on my own without her or Mike. I hope I don't sound like a baby... but I am scared. I've never lived by myself before. And yes, I have my neighbors, and yes, I have my boyfriend and my sister nearby.... but its hard to explain just what I am scared of....

I used to brave the wilderness on my own.. but I wasn't alone... Destiny was never more than 10 feet away from me.

Its hard not talking to anyone. I used to sit and read the Internet and ask for Destiny's thoughts on the news. Or ask her what I should wear on a date. Or ask her what we should do today. What should we do today Des? .... Brown eyes would stare back at me with contemplation...

There is no one to ask silly questions to, sing songs that I make up the words to, or make idle conversation with.

People who don't understand offer for me to borrow their kid, dog, cat... whatever. Some are kidding, some are half kidding.... some are sincere. Like I said... Destiny is my soul mate.... you don't borrow soul mates.

Each time I break down and cry I try to stop myself and remind myself that she is in a better place free of medicines, needles, and pain. But my tears flow selfishly.... because it is my pain that I am in sorrow about. God I miss my girl.

I will get Destiny's ashes back in a couple weeks, and in the spring, I will go to Destiny's favorite places.... and I will memorialize her spirit and her adventures. I will also continue to breathe life into our spirit of adventure. We made a hell of a team her and I....

Thank you everyone again for the outpouring of love I have received here. I am amazed at this blog community ... and I am honored to be part of it.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Destiny Grace, Jan 11th 1996 - Jan 16th 2009

It is with a heavy heart I write this to all of Destiny's new-found friends. I helped my baby girl Des cross the bridge this morning.

Destiny's spirit remained unshaken - she was a fighter to the end... her spirit was willing, her body was spent.

I gathered close friends of Destiny to my home last night and we had a farewell party. My sister, my neighbors, and Mike were there to pat her, to tell her we loved her, and we watched pictures on a slide show to laugh about good times, and tell stories about our adventures together. I am so grateful the people who made her most comfortable in her last year were able to share that moment with her. She deserved to be honored.

After they left, Destiny had a hard night, and finally... finally... she convinced my heart I was doing right by her. I wont go into details about the night and what she had to endure... but I can tell you one thing - she never gave up. I sat with her all night, stroking her beautiful, soft, white fur, telling her I loved her, and that she added so much to my life. She made me a better human.

Morning came, and I never thought I could do it. I never thought I could carry her into the vet office, lay her down on a bed, and sit with her while she drifted away. But I did. I did because I told myself as strong as she has been for me, I had to be just as strong for her.

As I said... I cant do her life justice in one blog entry. 13 years ago, I went to a local animal shelter in hopes of rescuing a dog.... and instead, she rescued me.

She came into my life when I needed a friend... as I had just lost my best human friend the summer before. I was rebuilding my life, I had just bought a home with my then husband to-be, and I was just discovering who I really was... and she helped me discover myself.

We went on countless adventures - probably more than the average dog does in a life time - camping, fishing, hiking, boating, ski-jouring, snow shoeing ... you name it, we did it... we did it together. She added spark and fun to everything we did. She had an amazing way of touching peoples lives... to this day, it is my belief that she has far more friends than I do... in fact, people often remember her name before they remember mine.

She was the only one in the world who stuck by my side no matter what. A little over a year ago, we struck out on our own - I was leaving a marriage that had abruptly ended, and it was the first time I had ever lived on my own. It was a scary and lonely time. Destiny never waivered. Because of her, we got the apartment that we did... it was the only ad in the paper that didnt say "no pets" ... and, the ad said "free eggs"... come to find out, my landlords have 6 kids, 2 dogs, 2 cats and a bunch of chickens. It was the perfect new home for us. She got to chase chickens, play with kids and became one of the pack. My landlords quickly became our best friends.

She stayed strong and with me through it all. She was strong when I couldnt be... she added a sense of peace and calm to my new home that only she could bring. She made sure I was happy again, and I was going to be ok... she knew that Mike and Derby would be there for me. She knew it was her time. She just had to convince me of it....

This song came on the radio this afternoon... and it says everything about what I am trying to say about her.... I needed her, she needed me... she was my Destiny.

I cried a tear
You wiped it dry
I was confused
You cleared my mind
I sold my soul
You bought it back for me
And held me up and gave me dignity
Somehow you needed me.

You gave me strength

To stand alone again
To face the world
Out on my own again
You put me high upon a pedestal
So high that I could almost see eternity
You needed me
You needed me

And I can't believe it's you I can't believe it's true
I needed you and you were there
And I'll never leave, why should I leave
I'd be a fool
'Cause I've finally found someone who really cares

You held my hand
When it was cold
When I was lost
You took me home
You gave me hope
When I was at the end
And turned my lies
Back into truth again
You even called me friend

Repeat Chorus

You needed me
You needed me

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Sweet Zoe....

Hello everyone - its Destiny's DogMa Cilly...

When I started this blog for Destiny, a lovely girl named Staci befriended me. She is the DogMa to an adorable border collie Addie, a baby puppy Lucie, and a sweet red-head - Zoe.

Zoe had heart and renal problems, but like Destiny - she was a little fighter. She loved her family, her doggie sibblings, and she loved life.

Zoe passed this morning in her Momma's arms. My heart is breaking because her story is much like Destiny - she got ill in April 2008, her Momma took wonderful care of her, and she romped and played with her puppy pals... she did the very best she could. She had a sister go before her - K-8, so she had a furry friend waiting for her on the other side.

Please give Staci some cyber hugs. DogMa's need lots of love and understanding. I wish more people understood that this is like losing a child, we need time to mourn, we need people to understand that these arent "just dogs" or "just pets"... they are our babies... their blessings are just compacted into much shorter years.

Rest sweetly little red-headed Zoe...
Cilly and Destiny

Ten Ass City?

Hewoo every doggie....

Mommy keeps saying I have Ten Ass City. I dont know who these Ten Asses are ... or why they have their own City.... but I guess I rule them.

As the Queen of Ten Ass City - I declare today a day where I get to sleep in front of the TV, watch Animal Planet, and have the Food Lady wait on my every beck and call. Let it be done!

Seriously folks, its been a loooong couple of days. I've been eating - sometimes on my own, sometimes not... but I have been eating little things here and there. Momma discovered I like Friskies kitty treats. Hey - anything to get me to eat.

But its hard. I have been very quiet. I sleep alot. I dont really feel like doing anything - and that's not like me... its winter out - I love the snow, but Momma wont let me outside for long because its zero degrees out. *sigh* Back in the old days, that wouldnt have stopped me from making some snow angels and biting at the snow.

Momma is taking tomorrow off from work to be with me... that will be nice. She has been under alot of stress, and has been very sad. She said she will talk to me more tomorrow about what I want to do. All I know, is I am very tired - its hard work being the Queen of Ten Ass City.

Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers ... but I think Momma needs them more than I do right now.

Eskie Kisses -

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

OH WOW....

Guys... Momma told me to check my bloggie today... she said I would never believe it.

Momma is still wiping tears from her eyes, she just cant believe the outpouring of love and support you have shown us. Momma said I must be a very special doggie to have so many friends.

I'd like to say theres been a dramatic difference since yesterday but....... the best thing that happened was I stayed at my Momma's boyfriends house, and his Mom dotes on me. I call her the Food-Lady. She is always making me and Derby Delicious treats and she takes good care of me while Momma is at work.

She made me two little dishes of chicken and rice, and I ate both dishes. Slowly, and it took some coaxing, but I ate it. Momma cried and cried when she got to see me eat. Silly Momma.

No accidents in the house last night, but Momma noticed when I went to do my business, it was pretty "squirty"... but eh, at least I was able to make it through the night and do my business outside for a change.

Momma gave me more medicine, more fluids, and is getting ready to take me back over to the Food-Lady's house for the day while Momma goes to work. Momma is having a stressful time, so its really nice that the Food-Lady is taking care of me so Momma doesn't have to worry.

So right now, we are just taking it one day at a time. If more humans knew how to live in the moment like us doggies do, it would be a less stressful world - wouldn't it?

I am so grateful for all my new doggie friends. What a wonderful pack of friends! I love you all, and Momma is going to try to visit more of your bloggies when she can.

Eskie Kisses

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Pray for a Miracle

Hi everyone - its Cilly, Destiny's DogMa.

First off, I know I have some family and friends who read Destiny's blog - and while its hard to read "news" on a blog, I dont think I could make it through phoning all of you.... I can barely talk, let alone repeat the news over and over again... so I apologize for the lack of "personal touch".. but hope you all understand.

We got back from Dr. N's office. Mike went with me for support. I'm glad he did, because I really needed someone there to support the difficult decisions that I was making. I am grateful to have a person in my life with the strength to be by my side.

Destiny weighs 29.5#'s... half her normal body weight. That would be like me weighing 75#'s... Its frightening.

Dr N. suggested that we do an X-ray and blood tests. The blood tests I understood - but I didnt understand what the X-ray was for. Dr. N said she was looking to see what was causing Des not to eat, and to have diarrhea. "What do you think it could be?".. cancer, lymphomia, cysts, tumors....

Then what?

Then we will know.

But we cant do anything about it.

I would say her options are limited.

I dont think I want to know if there is nothing we can do for her....


We discussed other options. Some were options I thought I would never have to discuss. Today was not the day to make decisions. It was to discuss what was best for Des.

Destiny got a shot of steriods today, and a prescription for appetitite stimulants. I got more fluids, got more instructions on what to do the next two days... and I got an estimate for euthanization and cremation costs which I promptly shoved in my pocket. Hopefully I wont be needing that... but I still have to know.

With heavy hearts, we walked out of Dr. N's office, knowing that I have about 48 hours to make a decision. Destiny either eats or she doesnt. She rebounds, or she declines... but she cant go on like this...

My girl keeps giving me small glimmers of hope. Like today, as I was about to shove scrambled eggs down her throat, she starting eating them willingly. Actually, she picked them up in her mouth and spit them back on the plate - but it was the most interest she had shown towards food in almost 2 weeks. She accepted a biscuit and tried to chew it, but that ended up on the floor too. She tries SO HARD. Who am I to crush that spirit?

Des and I have gone everywhere together. From the first time I saw her sweet furry face at the kennel, I knew she was my Destiny. Since then, we have hiked mountains, swam in waterfalls, fished in rivers. We have cross country ski'd in the moonlight, basked in the sun, made snow-angels and have had snowball fights where we both ended up with facefuls of snow. We have camped under the stars, kayaked down rivers, and walked in the sand and ate pinick lunches on the beach. She was happiest on the water or the snow. I was happiest when she was happiest.

She would follow me anywhere.

But eventually, her journey will end... and mine will have to go on... without her.

You are my Destiny
You share my reverie
You are my happiness
That's what you are
You have my sweet caress
You share my loneliness
You are my dream come true
That's what you are
Heaven and heaven alone
Can take your love from me
'Cause I'd be a fool
To ever leave you dear
And a fool I'd never be
You are my Destiny
You share my reverie
You're more than life to me
That's what you are
You are my Destiny
You share my reverie
You are my happiness
That's what you are

Monday, January 12, 2009

"Spa" Day....

Momma came home from work early today and she gave me a "spa" day...

More out of necessity than anything else... I had a big messy incident this morning, and as other eskie friends must know, white fur + being sick = big mess.

So, Momma gave me a hot (you know... doggie hot) shower, and then blew dry my fur so I wouldnt catch cold. I have been curled up sleeping since my bath. Momma thinks that the warm water might have made me feel good. All I know is it made me sleepy.

Tomorrow I go see Dr. N. Momma said we will get some answers tomorrow. Silly humans - always asking questions. The only question I have is "where is the remote? - I wanna watch Animal Planet"

I will give you all an update after I get back from Dr. N's.... until then -

Eskie Kisses

Sunday, January 11, 2009

It's my 13th Birthday!

Woof... I didnt think I would make it to this day.... and its a hard day at that.

Last night was not a good night for me. Momma woke up about 3am to hear me crashing around the apartment. For some reason, it looked like I was running away from something. I kept running into walls, and running away from Momma. Momma finally caught me, and we sat on the couch. Momma said it felt like my heart was going to thump out of my chest... Momma wonders if I was having a heart attack or something - it really scared her... scared me too!

It was a long two hours after that, Momma held me in her lap, and I actually snuggled on her chest. I guess I never did that much before, because it struck Momma as unusual enough to make her cry.... I fell asleep, and after a while, Momma did too...

Then we just sat together for a couple hours. Momma knows something weird happened, because I keep walking around uneasily, and I have a really hard time laying down. She told me Happy Birthday and wished I felt better.

So, its a good birthday, but a sad one too. Momma said she will take me to see Dr. N. Tuesday. She wishes she was open tomorrow, but she's not.

Momma made me an omelette for breakfast. I didnt want to eat it, Momma kind made me eat it. She felt bad doing that, because she promised she would never force me to eat anything, but she said I have to keep my strength up a little while longer.... so the egg peices went down whether I wanted them too or not. I came by while Momma was sitting on the couch and gave her lovin's and she knows I forgive her for it.

Thanks every doggie for all the birthday wishes and support - it means alot to me.

I am going to go sit on the couch and enjoy the rest of the day.

Eskie kisses

Saturday, January 10, 2009

I wont give up, if you dont give up..

Today is a different day. There is a different energy in the air. The sun is shining, (albeit, its below zero outside)... Derby had a sleep over to keep me company... and.. I am perkier.

I cant say I feel 100%, but I have been alot more active today. I even ate some beef baby food Mike brought over.

After Momma told Dr. N about me - about being tired, not wanting to eat, and having really BAD breath... Dr. N said that I probably have something gastric or intestinal going on... she recommended Momma stop giving me Beneazipril and asprin, and to give me a Pepcid AC.

I dont know what's in that Pepcid that works so good - but I did not get sick last night, and I feel better today.

Momma said we will see how the weekend goes, and we will go see Dr. N on Tuesday.

Momma told me this morning "I wont give up, if you dont give up." and I whispered the same thing back to Momma.


Friday, January 9, 2009

I'm still here....

Thanks for the thoughts and prayers every doggie...

My Momma is having a hard time. She wants me to eat, and I have decided its no longer necessary to eat. Momma has done a really good job taking care of me. She nursed me back to health when I was really sick last April, and because of her, I got to have an awesome summer running and playing and enjoying life.

I dont think I am enjoying life anymore. I'm tired.... and its easier right now to lay on the couch and rest... eating isnt fun anymore. Momma has made me rice and hamburger, chicken, cream of chicken soup, eggs.. you name it ... she has made it for me. I know it makes her sad when I don't eat it... I wish Momma werent sad... I wish I could tell her its ok.

Momma doesnt know what to do. She doesnt want to give up if I wont give up... but she cant tell if I have given up or not... so she keeps trying to get me to eat, she makes me take my medications each day, and she gives me Sub-Q's every morning. I appreciate all she is doing, she makes me comfy while she goes to work... she makes sure I have a full bowl of water, and she even leaves kibble out for me, even though I havent eaten kibble in weeks, and she leaves the TV tuned to animal planet, and makes sure there is a blanket and pillow on the couch.

Momma called Dr. N this morning to see if there is more she should be doing.... and is waiting for a call back. While Momma frets and fusses, I am just going to take a snooze, wait it out, and see what happens.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

A Dog's Plea


Treat me kindly, my beloved friend, for no heart in all the world is
more greateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.
Do not break my spirit with a stick, for though I
should lick your hand between blows, your patience and
understanding will more qucikly teach me the things
you would have me learn.

Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's
sweetest music, as you must know by the fierce wagging
of my tail when your footstep falls upon my waiting ear.
Please take me inside when it is cold and wet, for I
am a domesticated animal, no longer accustomed
to bitter elements. I ask no greater glory than the
privilege of sitting at your feet beside the hearth.
Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for I cannot tell
you when I suffer thirst.

Feed me clean food that I may stay well, to romp
and play and do your bidding, to walk by your side,
and stand ready, willing and able to protect you with my
life, should your life be in danger.

And, my friend, when I am very old, and I no longer
enjoy good health, hearing and sight, do not make heroic
efforts to keep me going. I am not having any fun.
Please see that my trusting life is taken gently. I shall leave
this earth knowing with the last breath I draw that my
face was always safest in your hands.

author unkown

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Hanging in There...

Hello Every Doggie -

Thank you everyone for your prayers and concern. I am still hanging in there. Momma is really fretting over me, and its ok... I understand its hard for her - but she keeps telling me its not about her, she wants to make sure I am ok.

Momma has been giving me more Sub-Q fluids the past couple days. She says it will help my kidneys not work so hard to flush all the toxins out. I have eaten some chicken, and Momma makes me take my medicines... but I still feel yucky, and most mornings I get sick and throw up. Momma cleans up after me. I feel bad, but she says its ok. Mostly I just want to watch Animal Planet and nap on the couch.

I've been having a hard time walking around - I fall down alot. Its also hard for me to sit and be comfortable, so I get up alot at night and walk around. I know it wakes Momma up... and she needs her sleep. I try to be quiet... sometimes I dont even bark to wake her up to let her know I need to go out. She said she would rather be woken up than clean up a mess, but she understands I am doing the best I can.

Sunday is my 13th Barkday... Its been a long, hard year... but I have had so much fun this year too... Meeting Derby was definately a hi-light. I pretend he annoys me, but I actually love him alot. He is a good pup. We did alot of things together this summer - camping, walking, hiking, swimming... I even got a starfish stuck to my fur at the beach one day! Ya.. we had a great year, and I hope we get to play in the snow and have fun this winter... so I need to work on getting better.

Momma said we will celebrate my Barkday Sunday with some french toast. I hope I feel like eating it, but Momma said if I dont, its ok... its still my day, and I get to do what ever I want.

Thanks every doggie for all the support and prayers!


Monday, January 5, 2009

Great post about CRF

Hello - Its Destiny's DogMa - Cilly

Destiny hasnt been feeling very good since New Years... she has been lethargic, anorexic, and last night was very restless.

Its hard, because I tell my friends and co-workers about her, and they dont understand why I cant just "make her eat" .. or give her some "favorite treats"... well, its because her renal failure is causing her to have an upset stomach, or she may have ulcers, or she may not trust her food anymore (it might have made her nauseaus or there may have been nasty tasting medicines in it)

Its difficult and frustrating to watch her waste away - I cook her three meals, and she turns her nose up at all of them. I feel like I am failing her in some way. I know deep down I AM doing everything I possibly can for her... but God its hard.

I found a good article on blogger - its old, but has informative information for people wondering what CRF is, and how to prevent it.

The biggest thing is to keep your teethies clean, and avoid toxins like grapes, raisens and antifreeze.

My hunch is Destiny got CRF due to a bout of acute poisoning that happened to her when she was 8... I almost lost her then. She rebounded, but I had no idea what it did to her kidneys. Well, I guess now we know.

All doggies and DogMa's out there, please send out some warm puppy vibes for Miss Destiny tonight. I hope to get out of work soon and go check on her.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Happy New Years Every Doggie!

Momma tried to get me to wear a party hat to celebrate New Years. I'm not that fond of hats... so I am pouting in the picture.... but I hope every doggie had a Happy New Year!!!

I got treats after the picture... so Momma is forgiven for making me wear this silly hat..


Happy New Years Every Doggie!!!